Indiscriminate
from the March 7, 2002 Tahoe World
This Monday morning I was met at my desk by a letter written in criticism of my use of the word "healthy" in last week's column. The letter was signed "A reader.
"A reader" wrote: "Memo to Nathan Laver regarding your February 28 front page sports section column: please learn the difference between 'healthy' and 'healthful.' (I learned the distinction in high school English class. Did they give up teaching this?)"
"A reader" may have made a better case by obeying the rules of punctuation according to The Associated Press Stylebook and Libel Manual in capitalizing the first word after a colon when beginning a new sentence, though I will admit I did not pay much attention during high school English. Undaunted by "A reader's" disregard for his or her own writing I asked our editor and staff reporter about the issue.
"Who is this person and what is this person talking about?"
"I have no idea," they said.
So I went to the Webster's New Universal Unabridged Dictionary. Healthful means conducive to health; healthy. Healthy means conducive to good health; healthful.
The distinction having yet to take form I went to a book called A Treasury for Word Lovers by Edwin Newman, a book written because, "the English language is not being well served by many of those who use it." Nowhere in the book's 326 pages can there be found an explanation of the difference between the two words called into question but on page 91 a summation of the semantic differences between "differentiate," "discriminate" and "distinguish" can be found. Not exactly "A reader's" "distinction," so since we're being discriminating here I went to Webster for that definition and found that "A reader" had, indeed, used his or her big word properly. Well done, "A reader." Apparently someone paid attention in high school. Did they teach you how to sign your name, or was that in the punctuation chapter next to colons?
Looking for more clues I opened up P. Scott Hollander's: Handwriting Analysis. According to the book "A reader's" handwriting indicates a sincere and optimistic interest in the ideas of others, though tempered by confusion concerning trust evidenced by a slight upward baseline slant and controlled right angle of script with moderate variation. The open a's indicate what I hope is an open mind, making "A reader" likely to discuss feelings and receptive to other people's ideas, should his or her identity ever come to light. Not surprisingly the writing occasionally jumps off the baseline; the writing equivalent of a giggle. Though the poor organization indicates a softening of positive traits and a gravitation toward negativity most of the analysis remains consistent with "A reader's" varying medium sized lettering, which indicates an adaptable personality with genuine concern for the effects of his or her actions on the feelings of other people.
With this in mind I would like to offer "A reader" (and the other two anonymous voicemail critics from last fall) the following: I make the rules for my column. If I want to use the word ziggies and put : colons in the middle of a sentence, I can. If I want to say "soup is healthy" I will because "soup is healthful” sounds more like some cowering anonymous naysayer than a sports reporter/copy editor/page designer/budget organizer/sometimes photographer who is really just happy there is a sports section at all between his three jobs.
But I am trying to earn the distinction of maintaining all my readers' trust and I would never knowingly use a word without a healthy understanding of it.
And I still have no idea what "A reader" is talking about.